Getting to celebrate my friends and the good work they’re doing in the world is one of the reasons I love my job so much!
I’m kicking off my Managing the Motherload interview series (a series of videos in anticipation of my second book with Hay House coming in 2019) with a conversation with my friends Alex and Bob about… how to have better conversations!
My husband, Justin, and pre-schooler, Annie, had a great time tagging along with me to Brooklyn for the shoot. Justin handled the camera while Annie checked out the family pets. She was especially excited about the lizard!
Alexandra Jamieson is a success mentor, life, and health coach to creative, professional women who want it all. She is the best-selling author of Women, Food & Desire, co-creator and co-star of the Oscar-nominated documentary Super Size Me, and highly-sought-after wellness expert.
Bob Gower helps organizations move faster, create better products, and become happier, more engaging places to work. He is an authority on agile software development, lean theory, and responsive organizational design, and has advised leaders at numerous companies—including GE, Ford, Chanel, PG&E, and Spotify—in creating more effective organizations. He is the author of Agile Business: A Leader’s Guide to Harnessing Complexity and speaks regularly on organizational development and leadership. He’s also Alex’s adoring husband.
Together they wrote a book that I can’t wait to tell you more about… it’s called Getting to Hell Yes, and you can click here to get it for FREE (or get a hard copy from Amazon here). But first, watch our talk and find out why I’m so excited about this groundbreaking method for upgrading EVERY conversation in your life.
Want to know more about how I feel about Getting to Hell Yes? Read the foreword I wrote for the book:
Talking is a big part of what I do for a living. On video, on social media, in books — I spend most of my day engaging with other people, most of whom I don’t know and will never meet in real life. A lot of what I talk about spotlights social justice issues like racial and gender inequality and mental health awareness. These discussions can be tricky, especially with strangers, but I feel a deep commitment to having them. The success of these conversations — success meaning an encounter where both parties learn something and leave feeling heard and respected — is so important to me. To my regret, I spent a lot of years having unsuccessful conversations. I would leave them feeling frustrated, angry, or sad because there was more time spent digging in, defending, and deflecting than having a meaningful exchange of ideas.
These negative interactions weren’t limited to my work life. I wasn’t showing up as the greatest communicator at home either. I would mean well — inviting my husband or one of my kids to talk about something that’s been on my mind and that concerns them — but the conversation would quickly turn into a heated debate where one person was trying to win (that person usually being me) and the other person feeling attacked. I was so desperate to get my point across that I was coming off like a tyrant instead of someone who loved them and had their best interest in mind. These failed attempts felt terrible and like I was moving backward in my relationships.
This problem, these crises of communication, ended the minute I learned about ICBD from my dear friend Alex, the co-author of this book you’re reading now. “Bob and I have been working on something. Tell me what you think.” We were in one of our Mistressmind sessions (as Alex called them), daylong roundtables with a few of our closest women-friends where we would discuss business, family, and all the things that light us up (and keep us up at night).
She presented a bullet-pointed version of their method, and I furiously transcribed her words in my notebook. I knew it was something special before I even put it into practice. And soon, when I finally got to test it out for the first time with my husband, I knew it was a tool I couldn’t live without. ICBD has not only been a game-changer in my marriage — creating an intelligent framework for negotiations about everything from money to sex to who’s doing what chore — it’s changed the way I engage with my kids, my friends, and everyone else I love. And it’s changed the way they go out and engage with the world.
But the real magic of this method for me is that it doesn’t require two knowing participants to make it work. If just one person understands how to apply it, the interaction benefits all involved. Following the steps of the method has taught me how to communicate all my ideas better, even in “one-sided” conversations. My social media posts, videos, and articles became more effective, reaching more people and resonating more deeply — exactly what I want most as an advocate and activist who wants to make change in the world. Today, I share this method with my family, friends, coaching clients, and online audience. It’s one of my all-time favorite personal excellence tools.
ICBD elevated the way I show up and serve. I already knew how to talk — I’ve been yapping away and sharing my big ideas for 40 years. Alex and Bob’s method taught me how to communicate. And now I’m so excited that you get to experience its magic for yourself!
Don’t wait to get your FREE copy!
This book has completely changed the way I communicate with everyone in my life. So much so that I dedicated a big part of one of the chapters of my next book, Managing the Motherload, to talking about it. Download your free copy with free bonuses at GettingToHellYes.com. You can also pick up a copy from Amazon here.
More support from my new online community is waiting for you…
Check out my new Patreon page for even more gifts and bonuses for my most engaged community members. NEW ON PATREON: I’m adding an exclusive audio download of every new meditation, giving advanced previews of my next book, and hosting twice-monthly live group coaching sessions!
Rebekah “Bex” Borucki, founder of BexLife.com and the Blissed In® wellness movement, is a mother-of-five, TV host, yoga and meditation guide, author, speaker, birth doula, and popular social media personality. Her first book, You Have 4 Minutes to Change Your Life (Hay House 2017), is available now, wherever books are sold. Read more about Rebekah here.